"The Real Voyage of Discovery..." (Vilcabamba, Ecuador)

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.” - Marcel Proust 

 

Ahhh... I have some time to sit and relax, sit and reflect, sit and write a proper blog.  I have only been in Ecuador for 12 days, but it has been a whirlwind tour it seems from the north of the country right down to the south. I am only a short ways away now from the border of Peru and have slept in 7 different towns/cities in these past 12 days.  It´s only because I am traveling alongside Jimmy who has is ending his 14 month trip on December 22nd and is at the stage where he is trying to squeeze as much as possible in. I know the feeling, I have been there before back in 2005 when I ended my 17 month trip.  

 

I don´t like to travel this fast, nor does he, it is exhausting! Gee, it seems like I have been living on buses. 8 hours here, 6 hours there, 90 minutes here, and another 5 hours there.  It amazes me how I can just sit on a bus and do absolutely nothing for these amounts of time. A numb ass and a numb mind as I doze away in my recliner seat and stare out at the green mountainous scenery and the tiny little towns pass by.  I do enjoy the spontenaeity of it all though. Some days Jimmy and I will wake up and 20 minutes later Jimmy will say "let´s go to the next place".  We will then proceed to look at the map and point at a place, 15 minutes later my whole life will be packed up, on my shoulders, and ready to move on.  

 

The last 12 days have been interesting, Jimmy and I didn´t end up doing a 4 day tour in the amazon as planned. It was too expensive for Jimmy, so I suppose I will do it at some other point in my journey, as the Amazon extends into other countries.  However, one day we did trek through parts of the jungle to find a gorgeous waterfall where we were all by ourselves and ended up swimming in our undies and relaxing on the mossy rocks. The following day we decided to find an animal rescue centre that didn´t seem too complicated to find but ended up a little lost in the jungle, in our flipflops, slipping around and getting stuck in the muddy trails. Upon arrival at the centre, 1 hour later, we were greeted with faces of confusion because we didn´t have a jungle guide and we then told how lucky we were that we weren´t attacked by spider monkeys. If Marlene is reading this... thanks for the German good luck wishes you sent in my last blog, it helped.  (I don´t know how I ended up deleting the comment by the way).  

 

So now I am in a hippy, laid back town called, Vilcabamba, which is roughly translated to the Sacred Valley.  I am surrounded by older generations of gringos and younger spiritual travelers all wanting to find some kind of peace here, either that or just smoke some weed and chill out. Perhaps it´s the same thing. I don´t know if I really belong here, but I am trying to just be.  I suppose I am a hippy in my own right, a nomad with no direction...

 

It has been almost 4 months since I started my journey and I often wonder what I´m doing. Am I in search of something?  As the quotation states, the real voyage is not about seeking new landsacpes but about having new eyes, or new perspectives.  I say it all the time, traveling changed my life during my first big trip throughout Asia. Back then, I was so passionate, so idealistic about wanting to help others, wanting to change the world, wanting to give back to the universe that has served me well.  And so, I did something about it, I went into social work and educate others about inclusion and diversity.  This time around, I was hoping for some kind of similiar experience. I am waiting for these new eyes once more. At the end of 2011, a year that has brought me much heartache, pain, strength and new opportunities, I wonder where I am now.  I wonder what the purpose of my travels are, is it really to find something? Or is it to just BE.  No expectations will bring new eyes perhaps. This topic of journey continues to boggle my brain, pinch at my heart, and leave me often confused.  What is my journey?  I know it is an on-going process, and I often wonder if I am in that most dreadful place, THE WAITING PLACE that Dr. Seuss speaks of in my favorite book, my bible, "Oh! The Places You´ll Go!".  

 

"Waiting for a train to go, or a bus to come, or a plane to go, or the mail to come, or the rain to go, or the phone to ring, or..."  

 

What am I waiting for? I suppose at times, in this journey we all get a little lost, a little confused as to what exactly we are meant to be doing.  Perhaps all this relates back to my search for stability. Perhaps this nomadic lifestyle (it is a lifestyle, not a vacation - huge difference) is not meant for me right now.  With all this said, I have just been confirmed a job position in Quito, Ecuador. I will be working at a hostel there starting on January 3rd for at least one month. I won´t be paid in cash, but with free food, booze, accomodations, spanish lessons and a few other perks.  So I will see where this new path will lead me.  

 

As I sit and write this blog... there is an older white woman on skype talking with her step-daughter I believe and she seems to be talking about a lot of the same stuff I talk about. She is old and wise, but she seems to be in the stage as me. Is that what happens, the continous journey of questions?  A continous journey to find new eyes, and not new landscapes...